I bought last year's Thanksgiving turkey at that farm near the nuclear plant.

I'm really sorry for how the United States illegally invaded the shores of Tripoli. Please accept my apology.

I don't get the snotty b****es who stare me up/down. I don't dress provocatively and suffer low self esteem. I also ignore their flirty husbands. Haters.

I want to drop out of college and be an artist.

I'm only 42 and I would never commit suicide, but I am 100% ready to die. I don't like life. I feel like I was born into slavery. Life is boring. I'm tired.