You poor bastard. I've been there.
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As long as your marriage is not or abuse in any form it is salvagable. Learn to love your spouse if you can...thinking about what-if is not conducive to a happy relationship. PLUS you have nop guarantee that this personm would have made you happy anyhow...all you remember is the puppy love feeling from long ago. LIFE IS NOT A ROMANCE NOVEL.
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I agree with the second post.
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The thing you may come to realize is that your old love is just a ghost that YOU resurrect when you are unhappy with reality. It feels so real, like there is a spiritual connection with this person that transcends time and space...but as soon as you find real happiness in your life, all that goes away. I hate to sound cruel, because I know how amazing that "connection" can feel, but it's all in your head!
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I went back to visit my childhood sweetheart in 1990 and he was single and very handsome. He wanted me and wanted a life with me. But I wanted to build job stability and go to college while he wanted us to live in a trailer or live with his mom while he worked as a stock person and was content to stay with his mom for life. Am I shallow for wanting to build a life with someone who aspires to something beyond a trailer? Then I found out he was an alcoholic and used drugs. I guess maybe my "gut feelings" were more aware of the situation than I thought?
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Is your name Linden? If it is.....I feel the same way.
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