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I needed the money so bad I sold my virginity for 150$ at the age of 14 so I could buy food for the rest of my family. I've never had sex since.
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The only reason I broke up with you three years ago was because i was playing T.O.D with a girl and found out I'm a lesbian.
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I hated my abusive mother so much that when she died and I got her ashes I smashed and scattered her remains at a garbage depot.

I hate her more now.
Rating:   112 Ups   30 Downs  
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Sometimes I like to stand in the shower with my clothes on and pretend I’m in a submarine that’s been hit.
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My wife has no idea that I was planning on firing a bullet into my head the night she called me for our first date eight years ago. Thank you darling.
Rating:   275 Ups   14 Downs  
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